Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The Placket Racket.


I realized today that I never posted a photo of my first version of Ottobre 1-2009 #35.  Uh.  So here one is.



It’s very wrinkly because I took this photo at 9 pm after a long day of 112 degree heat.  That’s 44 degrees if you’re wanting to be all metric and whatever. 




(crickets chirping)


(coyote baying in the far-off distance)




(more crickets)

Oh!  Here's a photo of the placket that I utterly refused to make twice:


It's not that it didn't come out super-cute.  I just didn't think it was worth the utter horror and despair, I mean the small amount of added effort for something a kid will wear for about six weeks.

Case in point: in the three months since I made this for TLo, she's grown again and I'll definitely have to take out the elastic on the sleeves.  At least the rest of it still fits pretty well.  Hopefully it will make it through to the end of summer.

Monday, June 27, 2011

It Just Keeps Getting Weirder.

Dear Gentle Readers.  I now have proof—proof, mind you-- of The Weirdness Of The World.  The following is the first draft of a post I was maybe going to put up today (but had decided was sort of silly):

Right.  So apparently due to his being a nurse, the Husband feels compelled to gossip like an old woman… er… I mean, have interesting conversations with his co-workers.  Somehow last night the topic of Celebrity Free Passes came up (I guess they were discussing the movie "Hall Pass") and the Husband mentioned that he had "lost out" to (my celebrity boyfriends yes they are mine all mine no really oh just shut up who asked you anyway) Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig.  Which, when I heard this, I basically responded with much high-pitched derisive laughter and finger pointing and possibly the words, "Oh honey, you don't even make the list, it's a CELEBRITY free pass, you are not a celebrity and also I already have sex with you on a fairly routine basis you goof ball bahahahahahahahhahaha"  etc etc etc.

Um.  Right.  Possibly TMI. 

Ask me if I care.  Go on, ask.  I am in a MOOD today people.  Don't push me.

Annnywho, The Husband scowled at me over his hamburger and then this happened: he started listing his Celebrity Free Pass list.

At which point I became deeply, deeply disturbed.  Because really?  Those are some scary-ass women.  Like, people whom I wouldn't even want to be in the same room with, let alone anything else.  Rachel Wiesz springs to mind.  That woman gives me the heebie-jeebies.  I have no idea why.  She just does.  And


That’s as far as I got.

This is what happened yesterday:





edit: in the interest of clarity, I should maybe note that I usually write my posts two-three days in advance… in this case, I wrote on Friday.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Over The Moon.

In response to my (seemingly endless supply of) posts regarding my new movie-star boyfriend Daniel Craig, Jacquie wrote,

“Weirdly coincidentally I just came back from lunch with a friend who has been on her honeymoon in Italy and had found herself sitting at the next table to Daniel Craig in a restaurant -and it was the males she was with who got all celebrity struck. She did say he was even more attractive in the flesh. Is that possible?”

I mean, really.  Really?  Proof yet again that I am never in the right place at the right time.

But how wonderful does her girlfriend’s honeymoon sound?  Newly married?  Italy?  Going to places frequented by the Rich and Famous (and Totally Hot)?  That is excellent.

Here’s where I went on my honeymoon: Pukekohe.  From Papakura.  Rather surprisingly, there was a stunning lack of rich or famous or totally hot (uh… which we won’t mention to the Husband lest he get, you know, a complex).  Anyway, Honeymoon.  Pukekohe.  Seriously.


This is hilariously funny.  Everyone from New Zealand is sniggering right now.  Heavily.  It’s like saying you went on honeymoon from Chicago to Skokie or Minneapolis to Burnsville or, I don’t know, Jersey City to Newark…. if any of those towns in question had about 10,000 people in them.  And a significantly large selection of tractors for sale.  Also, you know, more than three stores selling sheep food. 

OK, fine.  Sheep don’t actually eat food you buy at a store.  Whatever.  You get the point.

It’s a good thing I’m so low-maintenance.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Rave On.

‘K, so I was looking for something totally different but accidentally found The World’s Funniest YouTube Video (As Pertaining To The Word “Rave”).

I think the fact that it’s in Swedish makes it funnier somehow.  I’m not sure why… it just does.  (Which is odd since, as my dad is fond of saying, “Nobody likes a Swede.”  I’m maybe going to have to revise that opinion to exclude these two.  Also, of course, Alexander Skarsgård.

alexander-skarsgard-naked-07Although he basically looks like, you know, virtually every guy I went to high school with.  This is not a plus, trust me.  Big In Japan may or may not concur.)

Saturday, June 18, 2011

If Only Life Were Like The Interwebs…

So the other day I posted “Date Night”.   Pure drivel really, but having the distinct advantage of showcasing multiple pictures of Daniel Craig in various states of dress, undress and dustiness (I am not one hundred percent sure why this man gets hotter as he gets dustier, but there you go).

A few hours later, I happened to meander over to The Slapdash Sewist.  She has a substantial blog list, if you never noticed.  And when I glanced over to it?  My eye beheld this thing of beauty:

LOL I wish

Um.  Doesn’t that totally look like I went on Date Night with Daniel Craig?

That is awesome.

I have resolved to henceforth live my life only as it might look if viewed through blog caps on the internet.  Next week?  I make a gourmet dinner for 17 for under $3.50.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Date Night

Last month?  X-men First Class.

This month?  The Hangover.

Next month? Cowboys and Aliens!


The Husband said in a huff, "You only want to see that because it has Daniel Craig in it."


DC CandA


To which I wittily replied, "Well, DUH."




But in fact: Cowboys! Aliens! Harrison-Freakin'-Ford!

What’s not to like?



And of course Daniel Craig.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Eeni Meeni Chilli Beeni… The Spirits Are About To Speak.



Well, I finally found a use for that one giant button I had leftover. 

Probably this seems like no big deal to the casual observer.  But it was really bugging me having it sitting in my button box all lonely and pathetic looking.  Every time I came across it, it fairly cried out for someone to take pity on it and put it on something.  Like it had it’s own spirit or personality or something.  “Heeeeeelp me…. I neeeeed to beeee on a shiiiiiirt……”  I felt distinctly guilty every time I picked it up and put it back in the box.

Apparently TLo had a similar psychic attachment to it.  Yesterday the very first thing she said to my dad when she saw him was, “Look Granddad!  Mama put this big button on my shirt.  Look!  A big button!” 

Ok, then.

Perhaps the Great Button Spirit will rest in peace now.



Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Who Are You… Who who, who who? I Really Want To Know.

OK, that is the first and only time I will be quoting The Who on this blog (or anywhere else).  I am not a Who fan.

I just saw this article on my ISP's homepage (which I don't normally look at).  "Oregon Woman Develops Foreign Accent After Surgery".

I've heard of Foreign Accent Syndrome before.  Usually it happens to people in comas or with major head trauma or whatnot.  This woman merely had all her teeth replaced.  (Ha, “merely”.)


Here’s the syndrome I want to develop: Foreign Body Syndrome.


I want to have dental work and then wake up suddenly being Salma Hayek.


It could happen.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Tragically Hip


So seriously.  Unhappy Hipsters posted my submission… and used my DEAD WEBSITE AS THE LINK. 

Blogger traffic FAIL.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Blatant Promotional Activity. Not For Me, Of Course. For Someone Else.

So you probably already know that I love Ottobre Design Magazine.  I mean, not only do they provide excellent design and drafting, very helpful production instructions and totally adorable photo shoots, but they are also (as far as I can tell) Just Plain Nice People.  As an example: I had occasion to write to them a few months ago regarding a suggestion for their blog and got a very personable response from Tuula the next day.  Seriously, the very next day.  Just. Plain. Nice.  This totally appeals to my Minnesota Niceness.

Now I know I’m hardly the first person to say exactly these things about the good people at Ottobre and I certainly doubt I’ll be the last.  But I thought I’d also let you know of a lovely thing that happened just now whilst I was madly avoiding work by shopping--- er… I mean idly perusing the interwebs in my spare moments:

I just started a subscription to Ottobre Woman (I’ve been getting the kids’ magazine for about 4 years) because I dropped BWOF/BS and thought the OW designs seemed more practical (in that I might actually make and wear them).  As the start of my subscription I got the latest issue, 2-2011, which is nice but has an uncomfortably large (from my perspective) number of sleeveless garments in it.  Thus, I’m in the middle of working out how to add sleeves to a sleeves garment. 

“But I want to make some sleeved shirts nooooooow”, whined the voice in my head.  Fine.  Whiney-crabbypants in my head is irritating, so I decided to go through the back issues and see what I could see.  What I saw was issue 5-2010 and I liked what I saw.  Into the shopping cart it went.  I figured at €7.80 it was a bargain…. if you compare it to my $88/year BS subscription, from which I made one garment last year.  For a child.

But here’s the good part: when I clicked on “Place Order”?   I spy with my little eye a checkbox offering me free shipping on back-issues.  Simply because I already have an existing subscription.  Seriously?  Free shipping?  Even international? AMAZING!

Fine.  It’s not that exciting.  But I just think it’s one of those little things that makes their customer service oh-so very nice.  And I’m passing the info on to you.  Buy some back-issues.  Make some pretty clothes.  Live it up!  Free shipping, people.

I love those crazy Finns.